All posts in Family Life

Why Nickelodeon Needs a Kick in the Pants

I like to toss a rant-bomb into tween pop-culture now and then and it always makes people mad.  I really should stop myself, but I can’t help it.  I have a daughter that is racing at a screaming (or, I should say, squealing) pace into tweendom so my opinions run a little stronger in this department.

So here I go again, rant-bomb incoming…

Dear Nickelodeon,

I would like to make an appointment with whoever programmed the lineup for your recent “Kids Choice Awards” show.  This appointment would have one singular action item on the agenda:  me kicking you in the pants repeatedly until you promise to NEVER have the Pussycat Dolls perform on your stage ever again.

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More Shoppers Behaving Badly

After the death at Wal Mart, you would think some people would simmer down.  I suppose greed runs deeper in our culture than we thought.

Moral of the story:  Don’t be like these people.

Link to Embedded Video

Family Going to Church

This is a nice video from the recent Desiring God conference.  It’s convicting, so if you don’t want to feel convicted don’t watch it.

Link to video

Dolores Aguilar, We Hardly Knew Ye!

How horrible of a person would you have to have been in order to solicit this kind of obituary?  This obit is real!  Check it out:

Dolores Aguilar, born in 1929 in New Mexico, left us on August 7, 2008. She will be met in the afterlife by her husband, Raymond, her son, Paul Jr., and daughter, Ruby.

She is survived by her daughters Marietta, Mitzi, Stella, Beatrice, Virginia and Ramona, and son Billy; grandchildren, Donnelle, Joe, Mitzie, Maria, Mario, Marty, Tynette, Tania, Leta, Alexandria, Tommy, Billy, Mathew, Raymond, Kenny, Javier, Lisa, Ashlie and Michael; great-grandchildren, Brendan, Joseph, Karissa, Jacob, Delaney, Shawn, Cienna, Bailey, Christian, Andre Jr., Andrea, Keith, Saeed, Nujaymah, Salma, Merissa, Emily, Jayci, Isabella, Samantha and Emily. I apologize if I missed anyone.

Dolores had no hobbies, made no contribution to society and rarely shared a kind word or deed in her life. I speak for the majority of her family when I say her presence will not be missed by many, very few tears will be shed and there will be no lamenting over her passing.

Her family will remember Dolores and amongst ourselves we will remember her in our own way, which were mostly sad and troubling times throughout the years. We may have some fond memories of her and perhaps we will think of those times too. But I truly believe at the end of the day ALL of us will really only miss what we never had, a good and kind mother, grandmother and great-grandmother. I hope she is finally at peace with herself. As for the rest of us left behind, I hope this is the beginning of a time of healing and learning to be a family again.

There will be no service, no prayers and no closure for the family she spent a lifetime tearing apart. We cannot come together in the end to see to it that her grandchildren and great-grandchildren can say their goodbyes. So I say here for all of us, GOOD BYE, MOM.

At first, you want to say that her family is being a tad harsh. Then, you have to wonder… This woman must have been loathsome!

[tags]Dolores Aguilar, obit, obituaries[/tags]

cat warning sign

Pet Peeve #24 – Cats

No, not the play.  Though that may be pet peeve #23.  (Seriously.  If the play “Cats” doesn’t completely weird you out, then something has gone terribly wrong).  I’m talking about real cats.  You know, the ones that spend their first 3 weeks of life on this planet looking cute and adorable, and the next 10 years living as furry endentured servants of Satan.

Now some of you know that I have recently come into the possession of a cat.  Her name is Molly.  We got her free from some rednecks that already had 345 kittens in their little shack and just didn’t have any more room.  I was swindled by my daughters and their mother was in cahoots with them as well.  They promised that the litter box wouldn’t stink, the carpet wouldn’t get ripped to shreds, and the cat would be nice and sweet.  I’m such a stooge.  One bat of their eyelashes and pouty bottom lips and the room started to spin.  Next thing I know another warm body is hopping around my house whining and clawing at me because I’m not giving it enough love, affection, and name-brand food.

Why don’t I like cats?  Let me count the ways.

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Vacation Quotes from the Kids

We are on vacation at Carolina Beach this week.  Not that you would notice since the posting regularity here has been SAD lately…

Here are a couple things my kids have said that I thought were funny this week.

My 2 year old son, Owen, upon seeing the ocean, pointed excitedly at the water and yelled, “Nemo!  NEEEEMMMOOOO!!!! Where’s Nemo?”  Hmm.  I wonder if he’s watched “Finding Nemo” a few too many times.

My 3 year old daughter got her bathing suit on and her hair back in tails.  She says, “Oh!  I HAVE to go look in the mirror.”  She runs to the bathroom and returns announcing, “Ok.  I looked in the mirror, and I … am … BEAUTIFUL.”

Yes, dear, you are.  You’re a little cocky too but we can deal with that later.

Tip of the Day

How to remove pen ink from your favorite flat screen lcd monitor.

This would be after your wonderful son has completed his drawing and announced to you that he is impressed with his masterpiece.  This is also after you have announced to him that his life is about to end and he will be chatting with Jesus momentarily.

Take a deep breath.  Get some ordinary isopropyl rubbing alcohol.  Put a little on a soft cloth or tissue.  Rub the artwork gently.  It comes out in seconds.  I know this from recent experience.

This has also been known to save the life of two year old boys.

PS – This is only a guess, but I doubt this works with permanent markers.  Permanent markers are devices invented by Beelzebub as gifts to little boys on their 2nd birthday.  In fact, the word “Sharpie” comes from the Greek word “sharpos” which means “eternal damnation”.  Purge the wicked things from your house (the permanent markers, not the boys).  You will thank me later.

[tags]remove ink from lcd, cleaning tips[/tags]