Why I’m Mad at Miley Cyrus

// April 29th, 2008 // Family Life

Mylie and Billy Ray My oldest daughter is INTO Hannah Montana. She has the CD. She watches the show. I’ve been cool with it all up until now. Up until now, the whole Hannah Montana thing has been innocent, possibly even helpful. She’s known for being modest, family oriented and a good role model… things all too rare these days.

So why did I just ban her in my house? Why did I just make my daughter cry because she is too innocent to understand?

This week, Miley Cyrus posed for some pictures for Vanity Fair. The pictures were edgier (and sexier) than anything she has done up to this point. In one of these pictures she was topless, covered in the front by a white bed sheet (not pictured here… trying to keep the pervs off my site). Certainly not anything more immodest than what we all see every day at the magazine stand. But for a 15 year old girl that has been billing herself as a modest, God-fearing role model to my 6 year old daughter, I have to raise a a very loud and very angry objection.

Miley, your Dad screwed up. He knows better than to stand there while some morally ambiguous photographer talked you into taking your shirt off. You knew better too. And you don’t get a second shot. You see, the importance of my daughter’s entertainment level pales in comparison to the importance of her character level. There are some things I will not take a risk with.

I get that Miley is embarrassed. I know she isn’t a bad person and that she’s only 15. I know she apologized (well, her publicist did through her…). That’s all irrelevant. It’s not like she hurt my feelings. I don’t need an apology. I simply don’t trust her or the Disney machine to get their heads on straight for long enough to make sure such a stupid thing doesn’t happen again. (Not to mention the fact that I am far from convinced that this isn’t just an attempt to “grow up” her image without alienating too many parents of 10 year olds)

What do you think? Am I over-reacting? Is it just me or has she been pushing the edge for a while? I told Heather just the other day that the last 2 times I have seen Miley on TV (not her Disney show) she has been dressing and dancing with notably less modesty.

Maybe it stops here. Maybe it doesn’t. Either way, Hannah-mania is over at the Cotten house.

Technorati Tags: miley cyrus, billy ray cyrus, hannah montana, vanity fair, pictures

29 Responses to “Why I’m Mad at Miley Cyrus”

Joseph Cotten says:

April 29, 2008 at 9:43 pm

I agree. It’s pretty ridiculous that Miley and all the people around her could somehow be innocently unaware of what was happening. Vanity Fair certainly did an aweful thing here, but what kind of weird atmosphere must that have been on the set? With all of those otherwise “reasonable” adults standing around, what kind of worldview must they all be operating in to not say anything? All it would have taken is one person saying, “Uh, isn’t she 15?” I figure, if Miley Cyrus is surrounded by people who would encourage this, who knows what other, even more devious influences are being exerted upon her?

lew says:

April 30, 2008 at 7:44 am

i don’t blame the 15 year old, but i do blame every adult involved. this should be illegal, i don’t see how this could possibly be acceptable to anyone.

Andrea says:

April 30, 2008 at 9:01 am

Don’t you think everyone is slightly overreacting! In this country where most people never consider monitoring their childrens t.v. no less their behavior. Don’t even begin to pretend that most of you check everything your kids are doing today. Facebook, u tube, all programs on Disney (why depend on disney) Raise your own kids why are they watching anything on tv but travel channel and history channel. You sound just a touch envious of the stardom of the Cyrus family. Do not forget to turn off the radio they will here rap singers (sex, drugs, money) get real!

Sarah says:

April 30, 2008 at 9:02 am

I don’t know what’s more disturbing, the topless photos, or the shot of her draped over her dad’s lap in an obviously s*xy position.

Heather says:

April 30, 2008 at 9:48 am

I certainly hope this thing is not being blown out of proportion. In fact, I wish more people would stand up and say enough is enough. Andrea, I am Ben’s wife and we do monitor EVERYTHING our daughter watches and listens too. We believe in teaching our children through life experiences and the world around us and not constantly sheltering them just to cut them loose when they get into college. We need to teach our kids to be Godly despite their surroundings. We have kept a close eye on Hannah Montana/Mylie Cyrus in the event she would turn to this kind of thing. Unfortunately, her parents cared more about money then protecting their own daughter. We would NEVER envy any part of their lives. I would rather be poor then have the life where I had to sell my own daughter to make a quick buck!!!

Gloria says:

April 30, 2008 at 9:51 am

I agree with you, Ben. The priority for you as a parent has to be your children’s character. Yes, I too tend to blame the adults who have led a 15 year old astray, but blame is not the point here. The point is that Disney has once again proved to be untrustworthy with our children and, whether the world accepts their standard or not, IN MY HOUSE the standard of godliness will not be lowered! I have just as much concern about TV, YouTube, Facebook, and MySpace, so I set and maintain boundaries there as well. Am I perfect in my vigilance? No. Are there things I miss? Of course. Does that mean I should quit trying to be a good parent? Absolutely not! What I do and don’t do reveals my standards and teaches good character to my kids, even when I don’t do it perfectly, even when I miss things. My kids know where I stand and I hope they are learning to stand there with me. And, by the way, almost all the parents I know monitor their kids’ TV watching!

oneaustin says:

April 30, 2008 at 10:44 am

I don’t believe you are over-reacting at all.
In fact, it disturbs me that this type of reaction doesn’t come from more people more often considering that many “stars” that appeal to young children often pose or appear in a movie either this way or in an imoral situation.

The most important thing is that you explain to your child why the ~~idol~~ celebrity was wrong in their action.

We as consumers have let public figures and role models get by with imoral behavior for as long as I’ve been around.

I’ve realized that until recent generations, children were only exposed to (or raised by) family and friends behavior. Now children spend more time watching tv than they do with their parents.

Jesus will prevail.

oneaustin says:

April 30, 2008 at 10:54 am

If Miley is repentant, publicly, it could be even more beneficial to her young viewers. She would have to apologize for her mistake and give glory to God for forgiveness for leading others astray.
She should even talk about the feelings that tempted her to do that.

melody says:

April 30, 2008 at 11:47 am

I totally agree with you guys. There were other pictures she posed for on some web site where she is showing her green bra and laying all over some guy. Those were her choice, no accident. We have to be vigilent in protecting our children’s innocence for as long as we can.

MInTheGap says:

April 30, 2008 at 12:08 pm

It seems like it’s only a matter of time that things like this happen, unfortunately. It doesn’t matter who the star is. It doesn’t matter who the parents are. If I were jaded enough, I’d believe that the whole thing is always an act to make money. We’ve seen too many “pure, young, good, moral” ladies end up having taken these kinds of photos, are going to get these types of photos done, or showing up pregnant.

It’s almost enough to make parents look like the gullible ones, since they believe that it must be possible this time… Trust them!

ded says:

April 30, 2008 at 4:41 pm

I wonder how many Christians will denounce the act, malign the person involved and rail against Disney while still dreaming of or vacationing at Disneyworld? Remember the judgment you bring to others is the judgment you will be measured against.

We Christians cannot have it both ways. That is be able to denounce everything that offends us and still participate in or admire the “cleaner” aspects of the entertainment industry.

That which is not of the Spirit of the Lord will never satisfy the parameters of holiness, no matter how “unoffensive” it is.

I do not suggest a boycott. I would like to see some honesty.
“This TV show has NO spiritual value. I watch it because it is what is comfortable for me to do.” But I guess then we would have to deal with issues of being lukewarm and that is certainly not comfortable.

Part of the problem is a cultural American mandate that a beautiful song in the voicebox , packaged in a culturally accepted type of beauty is worth paying money to see. And Christians pay, though sometimes only if all the content is “Christian.” We still like our worship leaders to dress well and sing well and a refined, polished perfo–uh–ministry is a glory unto God, of course. Ever watch the Dove awards? Christians are as guilty as anyone else in exalting giftings above character.

When did we stop valuing productivity?

Ben Cotten says:

April 30, 2008 at 6:13 pm

ded, I hope I haven’t implied that Hannah Montana has “spiritual value”. I’ll be the first to raise my hand and admit that I live a life of comfort and that comfort gets me in trouble with Jesus (and my wife) all the time.

And I’ll also be the first to agree with you that materialism and the entertainment industry have had some ill effects on our world view. I, too, wish the Dove awards would just go away. Not only because of the self-congratulating but also the sheer cheesiness of it all. How many more times do we have to hear “God Bless the USA” anyway?

I just don’t think I agree with your assertion that participation in the culture is an all or nothing deal. Aren’t you arguing that if we are going to throw out (or criticize) one part of the culture we should throw it all out? Maybe I’m mis-understanding your comment?

That which is not of the Spirit of the Lord will never satisfy the parameters of holiness, no matter how “unoffensive” it is.

I never expected Miley Cyrus to satisfy the parameters for holiness. And as best as I can tell, neither did my daughter. Does that mean that I can only listen to music, watch movies, or read books that DO perfectly satisfy the parameters for holiness?

Can’t I have John Coltrane and John Piper in my iPod at the same time?

It’s an old question, isn’t it? At what point do we move from liberty to compromise? Where do we draw the lines?

Joseph Cotten says:

April 30, 2008 at 6:44 pm

We don’t satisfy the parameters of holiness. The best offering of worship by any human but Jesus can never satisfy the parameters of holiness. That’s what’s so great about the Good News! We don’t have to! We are free to enjoy the non-holy things of this life…”All things are permissable for me, but not all things are profitable to me.” All things are permissable, so there’s no condemnation to come from God or man to us for living in our culture.

Wine in moderation is good for the heart and stomach; in excess it leads to debauchery. Television in moderation is an example of God’s common grace exercising itself through technology; in excess it is a soul-poluting idolatry.

ded says:

April 30, 2008 at 7:52 pm

I couldn’t agree more with you and Joseph.

It isn’t that culture is an all or nothing deal. We cannot escape our culture except to become the new creation in Christ. Otherwise, we remain its slave.Then participation in the culture is an all for nothing deal. They have nothing to offer, and we should be willing to give our all.

However, Christians are not going to alter the material culture around us. Participating in the consumption of it, then being offended when lost people assert their understanding over it seems like a double-standard. If we are consuming what they produce one day; then when they show darker colors and we react with shocked horror, what does that mean? Are we honestly surprised that something we assumed was simply sweet reveals it is as tainted as the rest of fallen humanity? Does anyone really expect the entertainment industry to be sensitive? Why would we do such? Is Hanna Montana a role-model for any Christian child.? If so, how so?
She is nothing but a celluloid image,a caricature, a childish illusion, deliberately packaged to appeal to children for their power to influence parental spending.

Did she or the young woman who plays her say some Christian sounding things along the way? Miley Cyrus did the lead-in to a video shown at our school for St Jude’s Children Hospital. The video was provided as part of the promotion for a fund-raiser. Her scripted words and they could have been nothing less, were full of man-centered altruism. Sweet but lifeless. Yet, the commodity of “Hannah Montana” drew kids in. Good or Bad?

Regardless that she was not representing Christ, she was doing a good work. Can I be satisfied with that? Yes. I am glad kids with very serious cancers can be treated for free.

However, I find it insidious that the persona of Hanna Montana and a very young woman behind that mask are both used for entertainment consumption. Our culture is absolutely entralled with the imaginary, the presumed and the blatantly false. All to our detriment. We applaud people living in a false reality or at least willingly consume their image products, then claim foul when the expectations of the larger culture takes these people into realms we find offensive. Are we in relationship with them? Do we know these people, talk with them, know their hearts? Why have we included them in the community of those who help us rear our children?

Regarding culture, we do not throw it out nor remove ourselves from it, however, our interaction serves the purpose of modeling a different reality. We are on the Ark of Jesus with the opportunity to pull whomever will listen out of the flood of destruction into the community of God’s grace. That reality is not material, but spiritual. Enjoying entertainment and then becoming angry at the producers of such when they fail our standards seems an ill-advised way to illustrate our love.

Did these folks ever promise to honor what we feel? There is nothing wrong with family relaxation and enjoying the neutral but fun things of our culture. When that decision turns around and bites us, is calling out the failure of those who we allowed to serve us a just judgment? Did we really not know they would behave that way?

Ben, I have been bitten. This is not a holier than thou appeal.
I have watched many a movie only to regret it. I have also watched some movies other Christians would shriek over and found redeeming value. This is not about legalism or Christian standards. It is about the way love functions.

Ben Cotten says:

April 30, 2008 at 8:22 pm

Ah! I understand what you are saying now. Thanks for the long comment…

You are saying that we bit into the Disney apple that we all know is rotten. Then we got upset when we got a worm.

That might be true. I’m not sure, but I’ll consider it prayerfully.

But, then there’s another question hanging out there. Should we not still be angry? Shouldn’t we still cry foul concerning the incident in question? I don’t think in cases like this we should all just shrug our shoulders and say “Oh well. It’s not like we didn’t see that coming.”

ded says:

April 30, 2008 at 8:41 pm

Sorry, I am so wordy.

Do nothing? No. Always do what is within the heart to do. Always hold the heart in the love of Jesus.

hmmmmm. We wrestle not against flesh and blood. Is Miley the villain? Billy Ray? Vanity Fair? Or is it just evil greed again?

Angry? If Billy Ray and his daughter are Christians, express honest disappointment, concern, a sense of betrayed trust directly to them. Call them out of the illusion into relationship with their audience, maybe. Threaten to avoid their products? That puts the argument into the arena of the material again.

I don’t think being angry against these people accomplishes much, personally, but that’s just me. Again, I raise the issue of whether or not they are part of our community.

I do think anger can become a motivator to some very real and worhtwhile action. The Lord can accomplish much with motivated people.

Heather Cotten says:

April 30, 2008 at 10:26 pm

ded, I think you make a good point in that we shouldn’t expect from unsaved people a standard that we as Christians would hold. The Bible makes it clear that there are different standards for those of us who walk in the light.

For me, the outrage is the idea of a child posing nude in front of a camera being given a place and it being ok simply because she is a “rock star”. Whether Christian or not it just makes me sick to my stomach. It makes me want to cry for that little girl that her parents (again saved or not) wouldn’t protect her and let her be a child. Instead, they allow the pressures of the media to rob her of that innocence and as a result I am sure she is feeling the back lash of it which I am sure hurts her feelings and is hard to understand.

I do think that we can tend to be too judgmental of non-Christians at times. I know that I want to be careful not to do that, but my bone to pick is really with what this did to this young girl and as a result for those kids who looked up to her (whether right or wrong), it took away some of the fun and games of it and threw it into a place a 6 year old, 8 year old or even 15 year old shouldn’t have to consider at this point in their lives. We have, however, gotten to have some good talks with our oldest about it and for that I am grateful!

ded says:

May 1, 2008 at 6:35 am

Heather, I couldn’t agree more. I don’t react with anger but deep sadness over the condition of humans. No doubt, those parents are drinking the poisoned water of how to help their daughter build a “successful” career in the entertainment industry.

The depths of our depravity as a culture are more apparent daily.
All the more reason in my mind and heart to shine great amounts of love on all those around us. Only our Father can help. Our great love that others experience as starkly different from what the world exihibits will be used by the Lord to draw those into the reality of the good news of deliverance from the greed monster.

Gloria says:

May 1, 2008 at 4:15 pm

What a fruitful discussion this has brought about in my life! Thanks, Ben and Heather, for making a place for this. And thanks to all who made comments — especially ded. Your insights have stretched and challenged some places of small-mindedness in me!

Heather Fry says:

May 4, 2008 at 12:11 am

i think you are overreacting and you know what your little girl aint going to be an angel forever and did your daughter see her this way probably not. You’re daughter is only concerned about her singing and her show i don’t think she cares about one stupid photo. if you’re daughter is going to follow any role model she wants you are not going to be able to influence her forever.

Live.Awake » Random Thoughts says:

May 5, 2008 at 1:39 pm

[...] “Why I’m Mad at Miley Cyrus” post got a lot of heat. I’m thinking I should do a few more like it. Why I’m Mad [...]

/Seventy-Two » Mad at Miley says:

May 20, 2008 at 10:19 am

[...] to the importance of her character level. There are some things I will not take a risk with. Ben Cotten: Live.Awake » Why I’m Mad at Miley Cyrus This entry was written by oneaustin and posted on May 20, 2008 at 10:19 am and filed under Quote. [...]

Jennifer says:

July 31, 2008 at 5:01 pm

How many of us followed the real life “back story” of the tv stars we watched when we were children? Family Ties…. Growing Pains…etc. I was not the least bit affected as a child by the drug habits, eating disorders and fornication the actors or actresses of my favorite childhood shows participated in on their “off-hours” because my parents sheltered me from their real life dramas. We all have to remember that these shows are for entertainment and for the most part do not reflect the real lives or character of the actors/actresses themselves.

I had a similar situation in which I as a parent had a misjudgement with the High School Musical craze. My children especially my girls age 7 and 4 loved the first movie and it’s cutesy love story. I had watched the movie prior to their viewing and thought it was ok for them to see. I saw some of the character “mess-ups” as life lessons and an opportunity to talk to my children about dishonesty etc…Anyways, the promotion for the second movie was huge. At every Disney Channel “commercial” an actor/actress would introduce theirselves with their real-life names and promote the up-coming movie. My children became aware of the now real-life names of these characters and Gabriella (character name) became synonymous with Vanessa Hudgins. It didn’t help that the 2 love interest in the movie were in real life “dating”. My kids could not wait for the second movie. We actually had a little sleep over with their friends the night of the premiere and played High School Musical trivia. I thought it was cute that my 4 year old was saying she loved Zac Efron (the main star)…UNTIL I had a huge awakening a few weeks later.

The real-life Vanessa Hudgins posed completely nude for a couple of photos posted all over the internet. I was terrified that my children would see the headlines on the magazine covers that I avoided taking them with me to the store for weeks. Like I said, to them Vanessa was not just an actress playing a part she was Gabriella who they thought was this sweet innocent girl who didn’t even kiss the boy Troy (Zac Efron) for nearly 6 months after they started “dating”. I didn’t ruin the innocence of the Gabriella character for my children. I protected them from the harsh reality that these “idols” are mostly non-christians who get paid to play a part not necessarily anything like their real selves.

So I write this long email to say that the good-morals and values displayed on the shows and bubble-gum pop of Hannah Montana are still just that. I will not ruin that for my children by exposing them to her real-life sins. I will, however, shelter them from the non-scripted life of Miley Cyrus as I would any other actor/actress or singer.

aaron says:

August 18, 2008 at 4:31 pm

i understand if u guys think ur not overreacting, but you R being really judgmental. and ded, how do u know that some of the others who have commented are going to vacation at disneyworld or disneyland?

Alyssa says:

October 5, 2008 at 4:15 am

Miley just wants attention! what’s with all the mocking?! I think Selena’s t-shirt is great and so what if Demi’s had a gap between her teeth? That was yesterday! Miley is so spoiled she should be banned from the web and fired from Disney! She’s ruining Disney’s reputation. She keeps on making fun of Demi’s teeth, gawd, doesn’t she have a mirror? Just look at her BEAVER teeth. No offense to her fans but I think she looks like a pig when she grins. Selena or Demi didn’t do anything to her and Mandy is like so old! I think it’s a very good thing Nick broke up with her! She’s so mean and self-centered! Miley thinks she’s cool all the way! It’s good Selena is very or else Miley is dead. Miley only got famous cause her father is! Argh! I don’t care about thos racy photos but this is too much! She’s so rude and she’s a flirt. She just dates anyone and moves on so fast when they split. I loved Hannah Montana and thought it is a cool show but after I saw Miley’s photos and this video I lost my whole respect to her and I think she’s so immature, oh wait, she already knew that. And her fashion is so corny. I saw one of her pic where she’s waering blue boots with fringe! Eww! Far from fabulous! I just hate Miley

Vanity Fair Mylie Cyrus Pictures « Desk Glass says:

October 11, 2008 at 9:17 am

[...] http://www.kcweb.com/super/m_cyrus_blog.htm [...]

anna says:

January 6, 2009 at 2:23 am

im a fan of hers and she has a lot others i think she should do hannah monanah

austin allen says:

January 6, 2009 at 2:28 am

I personally dont think you should be mad at her because she did not show anything but her back…
it does not even show her sides..I can c u being mad as a dad but i would not be too mad.
like I said, she did not show anthing

Susan says:

April 22, 2009 at 8:19 am

It’s Really Good… I am Against then some how… but now i am thinking about it.

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