The High Stakes of Fatherhood
// September 24th, 2007 // Family Life, Sunday Recap
Eli was a nice man. By all accounts, he was a good man and well liked. He had two sons as well as an adopted son, Samuel. Samuel had been dedicated to God by his Godly mother, Hannah when he was about 3 years old. Yet I Samuel tells us that he brought judgment on Israel for 40 years. His failures as a father and as a priest in the tabernacle resulted in terrifying consequences. I believe that if the Church does not manage to find passionate men that are willing to be Godly fathers and spiritual leaders then not only will our families suffer, but we will lose the city to the Enemy.
Eli’s Wicked Sons
Hophni and Phinehas (Samuel’s two natural sons) were corrupt, godless young men with no regard for God or the tabernacle in which they grew up. Despite having grown up around such piety, with the ark of the covenant nearby they remained rebellious and unrestrained. They would steal the meat that was about to be offered to God to have for dinner. They would interrupt the sacrifice, reach into the pot and take the meat. If anyone objected they would threaten them physically. They seduced women that waited at the door to the tabernacle and had sex with them (presumably in the tabernacle itself). This shows a startling lack of a fear of God or even a basic level of reverence for His ways. (I Samuel 2:17) Remember, that the tabernacle was a holy place. A place to be revered and respected. These young men were committing blasphemy that should have horrified and enraged anyone who knew about it. Yet it continued.
Eli finally confronts his boys about their sin, and they ignore him. They blow him off as if he hadn’t even said a word. You can just imagine them rolling their eyes and saying, “Whatever, Dad. It’s no big deal.” By this time, Eli had so abdicated his authority as their father that they easily ignored his correction. So once again, Eli backed down and left them unrestrained.
God Has Had Enough
I Samuel says that a unamed “man of God” came and prophesied to Eli. In I Samuel 2:27-36 we find his prophecy, and it’s frightening. Because Eli has honored his sons more than Him, God is going to take both of sons on the same day as well as Eli. He will cut of the spiritual inheritance of the priesthood from Eli’s lineage and give it to someone else.
Then there is the familiar story of the first time Samuel hears God speak to him. He hears a voice in the night and thinks it is Eli calling. Samuel goes to Eli and finds out Eli had said nothing. On the third time Eli tells Him to answer the voice because it is the voice of God. Samuel does as Eli instructs and God proceeds to tell Samuel all that He had told Eli through the “man of God”. In the morning Eli demands that Samuel tell him what God had said in the night. Samuel tells him and Eli confirms that “it is the Lord”.
The Prophecy Fulfilled
How God fulfills His word to Eli brings me to my point. Israel goes to battle against the Philistines (as usual, right?). They lose the battle and 4,000 soldiers die. 4,000! That’s a lot of bodies to leave dead on the battlefield. I can’t imagine what that must have looked like. These were bloody battles fought with swords and spears. It must have been gruesome.
Israel was demoralized. They couldn’t understand why God had allowed them to be defeated. Instead of asking God why they were not blessed, they made a really stupid decision. Treating the ark of the covenant (and God) like a magical talisman to be used like a good luck charm, they removed the ark from the tabernacle and brought it into camp at the battle field. They cheered, thinking that surely now they could win.
The go into battle again. This time they lose 30,000 men (that’s not a typo) and Hophni and Phinehas are killed. What’s worse, the Philisitnes steal the ark of the covenant and place it in their temple next to their idols. When Eli hears the report of his sons dying and the presence of God being lost to the Philistines, he is so shocked that he falls from his seat and breaks his neck. He dies there in the dirt.
What Can We Learn?
Do you see the connection here? Do you see where Eli failed and brought judgment on his family and his nation? You see, Eli had never succeeded in confronting the iniquity in his sons. He had been intimidated. Maybe he just wanted to be their friend. Maybe he thought being nice was the most important thing. I don’t know. But as time went on, the brashness of his son’s sin and his passivity as their father grew. Eventually, his failure as their father led to his failure as priest. By the time God spoke, he was allowing the tabernacle to be desecrated daily right under his nose.
Look at the results of Eli’s refusal to restrain his sons and his unwillingness to complete his call as priest:
- Sons die in the same day
- 34,000 soldiers die
- Presence and blessing of God is lost to pagans
- Lost his own life
- the blessing to those came after him is removed and given to another
Men, the stakes are very high. When we fail as fathers, spiritual fathers, and priests in the kingdom of God the cost is incredibly high. Not only do we lose our children, but our churches and the cities in which we live will suffer. We risk the blessing of God being lifted and the reward going to another. Being a good Dad isn’t to just give us nice kids. Being a good husband isn’t to just give us a happy marriage. Being spiritual leader in our church and community is not just about having a big church. It’s about the city. It’s about bringing glory to God.
Failure is not an option.
[tags]fatherhood, church, family, parenting, Eli, I Samuel, Hophni, Phinehas[/tags]
This is a very important post Ben. Have you heard of Men’s Fraternity? (No, not as in jello shots and sorority girls) It is an awesome program with the goal of restoring Biblical manhood. Judd loved it, and I must say, I loved it, too. You can see it at http://www.mensfraternity.com
I just wish you had finished the post with something to the effect of, “…and you will never succeed if you attempt to win those high stakes on your own.” Men being who they are, some will undoubtedly take your challenging last line and redouble their efforts to be “godly” men and perform the “high stakes” role of father in their own understanding. It won’t work. It is Christ in you or nothing in all things and especially when parenting. I did everything I knew to do, was taught to do, believed I should do and I still got the nightmare call at 3:00 AM, “Hello, Mr. Davis. This is officer so and so at Boone PD and we have your son under arrest.” We either walk a NT reality of life in Christ or we don’t. Christian religion fails and fails and fails no matter what the stakes are.
Good point. When I preached this I spent a lot of time on that very thing. The only way any of us can accomplish our mission as Christians is through Christ in us. If I didn’t believe that, I never would have had kids to begin with!
The other thing I didn’t go into here is, what is a parent to do if their kids are grown? Is it too late?
I don’t think it is. Not at all. God can redeem anything. Repentance is a parent’s greatest tool.
All that being true, this doesn’t lower the stakes. Living in NT reality doesn’t make the OT reality any less real or the consequences of my sin less dire. Nor does it make my own propensity for passivity any less grievous. Repentance begins with facing the realities of what my sin means. It means I’ve offended my Jesus and brought death into my life and into the lives of those to whom I’m connected. It’s in the despair over that OT reality that the NT reality of the cross becomes evident. The realities of sin and death didn’t go away at the end of Malachi.
Seeing my sin and grieving over its effects in my life and in the life of my community is like the starting shot of repentance. This was my intent with this post. To fire the starting pistol.